Category Archives: Burritos

Cinco De Make Me Sick by Coughing on my Neck

Cinco De Mayo – 2/21/16 New Brunswick, NJ

It’s a Sunday and as usual I woke up early as hell, drank a crap ton of coffee, and plopped myself for a few hours on the sofa. By the time I realized I should probably do something useful the hunger had already set in. Felt like having a burrito, but was sick of the same old Chipotlaway (Chipotle – SouthPark reference). First thing I did was google best burrito’s in NJ, and up popped a reddit page that mentioned this gem in little Mexico – I mean New Brunswick, NJ. Called my buddy Dave up, and off we went on our Mexican journey…or as the Mexicans like to call it… a trayecto.

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Honestly, I wasn’t aware New Brunswick, NJ had such an insanely large Mexican population (or part of town). The weather was pretty nice, so there were mad people out and about walking around town. I’ve seen gentrification before, but wasn’t aware of the level of gentrification happening in New Brunswick – probably because I’ve only ever been on or near Rutgers Campus. Anyway, you can’t miss this place. The outside is painted in all bright colors and whatnot. Actually, on the wall of the building facing the parking lot they painted “restaurant of best burritos”. Pretty funny.

So we roll in and have a seat – you kinda get this dirty feeling when ya walk in, but hey…who cares, right? I mean, I went out of my way to get this type of food…it’s going to make my insides dirty then my toilet dirty, so fuck it! We sit down and the waitress walks over to us brings us fresh fried chips, salsa verde, and pico de gallo. All very good; fresh as fresh can be. Our waitress barely spoke or understood any English; which added a certain level of authenticity to our Mexican trayecto (can’t wait to tell people I journeyed to Mexico). At the same moment we got our food, this bumbling, dirty looking, homeless (I’m assuming) dude walks in and stands behind and to the left of my buddy. He’s just standing there and he starts muttering random words in Spanish for about 3 minutes. Eventually he sits down at the table directly behind Dave and I can see his dirty ass face (It literally appeared to have dirt on it). He sat there for about 10 minutes and of those 10 minutes he hacked his fucking brains out for 5 of them. I mean loud, sputum launching coughs that probably carried unknown diseases all over the back of Dave’s head. I laughed as Dave joked about getting SARs, Zika virus and hepatitis.

Other than that!! The food was great! I had a monster pork burrito -that I forgot to take a picture of- and killed the whole damn thing. The best part of the meal was the bill. For the two massive burritos we got we paid a combined $13.54. The price of just my burrito was $5.50. May have been some low quality stuff, and there was nothing different about this compared to any other burrito I’ve eaten, but pretty damn affordable and satisfying for a guy that doesn’t like wasting money.